Good-bye University of Florida... but not really because I'm still living in Gainesville.
I have been through a lot of emotions lately about it all. Scared. Nervous. Excited. Nervous again. Determined. Confident. Nervous again. Apathetic. Worried. Happy. Nervous again.
But here's the one i'm going to try my best to stick with - Confidence. its a grand idea and a word that has seemed to run the other way from me for most of my life. I don't know why confidence is so hard for me to wrap my life around. But it is something i have been working on a lot over the past few years.
I think some people are afraid to be confident because they feel like they are just being prideful. but there is a difference between confidence and pride. Pride is self-seeking, self-glorifying, and wants to take glory from God. But confidence is OF God. God wants us to know who we are through Him and in the power of Jesus. confidence is looking at yourself in the mirror and knowing that you have been made for more than just a life headed in random directions. its knowing you are a child of God and that He loves you very much. It's knowing that you have been created in the image of God and you are capable of all things through Christ (Philippians 4:13.) Paul says we should always be confident (2 Corinthians 5:6).
So why is it so hard to be confident?
Perhaps we look to much at others around us and try to line up our attributes and talents with theirs. When really, we have nothing to do with them. Jesus had to remind Peter of the same thing when they were walking on the beach together and Peter asked Jesus, "What about [John]?" Jesus told him that John has nothing to do with what He was telling him to do. (John 21:17-23). When God tells you to do something, you better believe He will give you what you need (or has already given you what you need) to do it. we may not feel qualified or the right person for the job, but God has a way of using our weaknesses to His advantage. (1 Corinthians 1:27, 2 Corinthians 12:10)
Or maybe we really don't know who we are. when the Lord tells you who you are, you have to believe that He does not waste words, and He really means that you are a joint-heir with Jesus.
We are all pretty messed up people. it's true. but that's the good thing about this paradox called walking with Christ. the weak are strong. the wisdom of the world is foolishness to God. Things are always backwards it seems, or maybe God just sees with a different kind of vision than we do.
God may be calling you to do something you don't think you can handle, but that means He just wants to stretch you a little bit and do things through you you never thought you could see. Why wouldn't you want to live to your full potential? Answer the call humbly, but be confident in your God. Humility and Confidence can work quite nicely together.
I've been reading Jeremiah lately and here's a verse I read this morning. its worth chewing on...
7 "But blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,
whose confidence is in him.
8 He will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit.